Firstly, if you are a boy or if you're not wanting to read waaay TMI about my girly bits, click away! Click away!
Ok girls and interested parties, here we go.
I met with the lovely Dr M today. He's very straight-forward and down to earth and introduced himself using his first name which is really only fitting given he was about to get intimate with me (and again, no dinner!).
We chatted, we laughed. Ok, he asked me a heap of personal questions and I tried not to squirm while answering them!
After he'd loosened me up with a bit of chitchat, it was down to business and he quickly had me half naked. *sigh* Again, more action these past months than I'd seen in a while! Up in the stirrups I go, trying not to make eye contact with the lovely Dr M who's head was level with my vajayjay. And yet again, what does my mature mind come up with? "Please don't fart!". I am like, sooo totally mature like!
So we had a date with the Metal-Duck-Bill-of-Lurve (aka Speculum) which hurt like a buggery. Dr M made some comments I won't repeat but let's just say you don't want to hear them from a date OR a doctor! A biopsy was done of my uterus which felt similar to being scrubbed on the inside with a steel brush while your body cramps down physically sending up pain signals that are screaming out 'GET THIS DAMN THING OUT OF HERE'. My uterus is already not a fan of Dr M.
After my pants were back on and decorum was re-established, we had a chat. It seems my right ovary has an endo growth. My left has a 5cm cyst (can I say, DAMMIT - that was supposed to be the GOOD ONE!). My uterus is too full, too bulky, and backwards and in the opinion of Dr M, needs to be removed. He's testing the biopsy and my blood for cancer and other lovelies, but says leaving it in there as it is will risk my health (read - may cause cancer in the future) and given it's current performance record, it pretty much sucks at its job anyway. He wants to remove the uterus, cervix and the right ovary. He wants to clean out all of the endo that's in there and try to save the left ovary so I don't hit menopause at the not-usually-referred-to-as-young-age of 36.
I walked out totally confused. Mainly because I was totally confused about what I felt. Confusing, huh? I'm not particularly attached to my uterus and right ovary (apart from the obvious!). A while ago I toyed with the idea of another child and discounted it. Not a great idea for our family or me, physically or psychologically. So I'm not upset for not being able to have anymore children. I think part of me is sad that the organ that grew and nourished my children needs to be ripped out.
Then I started thinking irrationally. Am I still counted as a woman if I'm missing half of my 'woman bits'? Will I ever have sex again? Will I ever enjoy it again? Will I ever be wanted again?
On the flip side . .
Reduced risk of Cancer!!!
Saving money on girlie products!